It's October...again

October comes once a year... every year. So, why is it a big deal? Many of you have heard me talk about the month of October. I believe it is a significant month for our adoption. Last year, God let me know this in the spring. I thought something might happen last year, but while many cool things happened that month last year, nothing referral-like happened. So once again this year I'm waiting, I have a renewed sense of anticipation of what God might do either behind the scenes or where we can see it. In the meantime all I can do is wait.

During the wait, my Chlo is becoming fearless. She has many amazing qualities but this hasn't been one of her biggest ones. Between her and Violet, Violet is the one who would take off down the street like a race car her first day riding a bike without training wheels and no knowledge of how to stop, oh wait, that happened. My Chlo is becoming fearless about trying new things, fearless about speaking her mind (not always at the best time), fearless about being who God created her to be, and more importantly she is fearless in her love of God and others. That last part is crucial. Our lives will change dramatically at some point with our adoption, and as the big sister she's going be challenged to be fearless. She will be fearless in her love of her little siblings, fearless in defending and supporting them, ready to take on the challenges of our new family dynamics and able to set an example for Violet who watches her every move and hears every comment. Sounds like a lot, and it is a lot. But, regardless of when it happens, this adoption is happening and I am so thankful to watch God prepare her heart and mind for the challenge.

Romans 8:14 "So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, “Abba, Father.”

At our church we are studying the book of Exodus. I looooove psychology and sociology. I love trying to get into the heads of characters in the Bible. It's interesting to look at their social situation or their environment and get a better idea of how they might think or feel. So, listening and studying about the Israelites and their exodus from Egypt has been fun. 

As Christians separated by many years and completely different social structures from these guys, I think we expect a lot out of the Israelites. We read about the great miracles God did with the Red Sea and the provision of manna and quail, the cloud that guided by day and the fire that guided by night. The fact Pharaoh even let them go was its own series of miracles. All we focus on are the huge things and they ARE huge and miraculous.

But we forget that the Israelites were human and flawed. We forget they were emerging out of a 400-year stint in slavery. For most of the people the slave mentality was all they knew--they had been born into it.  They had never been free. They lived in fear of their earthly oppressors. Four hundred years of slave life and a slave mentality is not something you forget overnight. 

When I read Romans 8:14 the other day as part of my devotion it really spoke to me. Romans was written to the Roman church and that church was comprised of Jews and Gentiles. Paul spoke to the fears at the heart of both of those groups. He addressed the history of His people, the Israelites, by referencing "fearful slaves" and He addressed the Gentiles who were adopted into His family.  Jesus and the Holy Spirit were given to both people groups and we all call Him our Father. 

Of course, the FIRST thing I saw in this particular verse was the word "adoption." That word might as well be a flashing neon sign. I immediately thought of the Bulgarian kiddos God will bring us and the cycle of fear they will be in. They may have been abandoned at birth and never known a parent, they may have had loving parents that simply could not provide for them and chose to find a better home for them, they may have been abused and malnourished. They will most likely be slaves to fear. 

God broke the cycle of fear and enslavement for the Israelites first with the Exodus and then broke our spiritual enslavement to sin with Jesus. We will attempt to break that cycle of fear for our children as well and provide them a family and an introduction to our Heavenly Father. But, like the Israelites, breaking a cycle only breaks the cycle. It takes time to develop a new cycle, to trust, to ignore the fear that permeates hearts and minds and live as beautiful sons and daughters of a loving Father. I am continuously praying for the hearts and minds of the children God has for us.

Only He can truly heal them of their fear and oppression and make them free.

It's October... I'm thankful for friends' encouragement when I get nervous and start to doubt. I will not live enslaved in fear and doubt either. God's plan is bigger than me and His timing is HIS timing, so I will daily break the cycle of my fear and keep moving forward in freedom through October.