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| This is our surprised face! |
Last week I posted after being in a serious pit. I was so discouraged. I had given up. But God...
God had a plan for us.
God fulfilled His promise.
God restored our hope.
God multiplied our joy.
Monday, we were told we would hear in the next few days about the little boy I shared about in last weeks post. Tuesday, they called and said he was no longer available for adoption. Wednesday, I wrote my whiney blog post. Thursday, God showed up in the most visible way possible. It was the worst and best week. My emotions are spent!
Kevy and I were sitting in Sahara eating yummy Greek food and feeling sorry for ourselves. Bulgaria is seven hours ahead of us, so we knew the Bulgaria work day had been done for a few hours by this time. Kev looked at me when we sat down and said, "Well, I guess we aren't hearing anything today." We had lunch, talked about the usual stuff and adjusted our mindset back to the norm, accepting the fact nothing was happening. As we finished our pitas and got up to leave, my phone began to ring. I have a special ringer that sounds like angels singing just for our agency's number. I set it a long time ago because #1 I was freaking out every time my phone rang for the past 4 years because I was always expecting "the call," and #2 I figured the only way we were gonna get a referral was if we had a heavenly choir accompanying the announcement. We stared at the phone, looked at each other and Kev said, "You've got to be kidding."
I will never forget her words, "It's a little boy." It was a whirlwind from there. We ran to our van and listened to the info about the little boy. She sent us his file and we got to see the face of our child. The minute we saw his sweet face and gorgeous eyes he captured our heart. I was a nervous wreck. We both were teary, my whole body was shaking and my chest was all splotchy. Any other redheads or fair-skinned friends out there? You know that splotchy fun. She asked us to respond within the next 24 hours and let her know if we wanted to pursue him. Was she crazy? Forget waiting 24 hours! YES, we want to pursue him!
This little boy's name literally means "Gift of God."
Isn't that just like God?
Let me take a few deep breaths and get it together. Ok, so what's next?
First, let me clarify some things. The first little boy we pursued was not a traditional referral. We were applying for him, as were multiple other families, so it was not a sure thing. This is a traditional referral, which means the country specifically matched this child to our family's dossier after their review and determined he was a good match. So, Bulgaria changing their minds or taking him off the adoptable children list is highly unlikely. Adoption is never a "sure thing" as I told my girls tonight, but this is as close as it gets until we bring him home.
After we commit to pursuing our traditional referral, our adoption agency gives us two weeks to get all our paperwork in, talk to our social worker and talk with an international adoption pediatrician. The first thing we did was have his file reviewed by an international adoption pediatrician. This usually takes up to three days so we decided to get the ball rolling. When we had this done with the other little boy, we used the International Adoption Clinic, part of the UAB Hospital in Birmingham, AL. They were very responsive after our initial call both times and speedy in their review. The first time we had to expedite the review and heard back within a day, but even without being expedited this time we heard back within two days. The doctors we spoke with both times were amazing, insightful and so supportive. I highly recommend them.
We contacted our social worker so she could review the little boy's file as well. She had to discuss his special needs with us and sign off on the referral. Once again our homestudy agency, Carolina Adoption Services, was totally amazing and so helpful.
There are about six documents that require initials, signatures and notarizing. We quickly did those and began working on our 22-page transitional plan required by our agency that explores every aspect of our knowledge about the little boy's special needs, how they impact daily life from now until their teen years, research we have completed, names of doctors and specialists we will use for each special need, discipline, handling prejudice, respite care provider names, integrating his culture into our lives, grief and loss, attachment, how we will respond to a list of potential behaviors, etc. You can never be fully prepared for the coming changes, but All God's Children's transition plan attempts to cover it ALL! It's one reason I love them.
Today we talk with our agency to review our plan and set up the rest of our continuing education training that we already began with the last little boy. After that call and our agency's approval of the transition plan, we mail them all of our paperwork. When they receive it, they communicate with Bulgaria to let them know we are "good to go." Depending on the court's schedule and how many people are traveling to Bulgaria for adoption right now, you travel about a month or so after your referral for your first trip--the "bonding" trip. This is our opportunity to spend as much time as possible with our little boy. So he can get to know us and we can get to know him. This is also the time we formally accept the referral. After we come back home we will wait 4-6 months before we are able to travel back to Bulgaria to pick up trip our sweet little boy.
Last night on National Sibling Day we videoed us surprising the girls with the fact they were getting a little brother. Chloe was completely enthralled. After our video, I watched her just sit holding his picture and smile for a good five minutes at his little face. Violet was Violet. Bouncing off the walls, being a goofball, making sure to find a reason to say the word "poop" at least a couple times in the video and in her extremely brief quiet moments between crazy moments sweetly saying "Hey, little guy."As my parents accurately stated, "I know y'all are ready to get this little boy, but is he ready for the girls?"
Those girls...they are crazy, they already love him and I'm pretty sure we are going to have to force them not to carry him everywhere. Otherwise the poor kid will never learn to walk.
The closing of Violet's prayer tonight accurately stated all our hearts in perfect unison:
"Thank you God for giving us the new little boy. He's adorable and we will love him forever."
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| We are waiting. |
If you have any questions post them in the comments, or text, message or email me! I will share as much as I can. As you know, I love to talk adoption. Now it's not just a general topic, it's a little boy with a face and a name.
Be on the look out for our new T-shirt fundraiser. I've been waiting for our referral before launching it with our new design. It will be coming in the next week or so! There are lots of available styles this time. Pilates and yoga friends, all you need to know are three words, women's slouchy tanks--I'm so excited.
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